No Bull Mom

Leaders and Followers

Perez Hilton so much wanted to be taken seriously -- and I tried. I really did. I listened intently, reserving my judgment for the moment, as he spoke to Larry King. I even agree with him that a better answer to his question would have been, "I think it should be up to the states to decide."

But I don't know squat about the politics of beauty pageants. Are they supposed to be political -- or honest? My guess is that pageants are like anything else in this country: political. If you want to get ahead, if you want to be liked, you say what you're supposed to say. I assume Prejean knew this going in, as she says she wished she had been asked any other question but that one -- as if she knew being asked that question would cost her the crown.

Think about that. Think about all the hours of hard work and devotion that goes into a contest of that kind -- and she was willing to give it all up for character.

And for her character she will be honored. God works in mysterious ways, and right now Prejean's getting so much attention and praise that I can't remember who actually won the contest! No offense to whoever did -- I'm sure she's not happy the focus isn't on her -- but right now we have a much more pressing matter to address in this nation. Political correctness has never been so tangible, and Carrie Prejean is the example we need.

The lesson is this: There are two types of people in this world: leaders and followers. Whether or not you're in the public eye, you're either a follower or a leader. Nine out of ten times followers don't think for themselves, or they try but they're too weak to make their voices heard. Make your voice heard. If you don't agree with the leader you're following -- whoever that person is -- find other mentors with whom you can admire. If it means you have fewer friends, so what. All a person needs is a few good friends anyway.

Carrie Prejean will come out ahead on this one. Perez Hilton made sure of that when he opened his potty mouth and called her a "dumb bitch."

I tried to take his comments seriously. I really did. Then he lost me.

The Miss USA Debacle

We are in deep trouble in this country, and I don't mean that as hyperbole; I mean it literally. It's one thing for traditional Americans to have to pander to the Left by pretending to think differently than they do, and quite another to choose not to pretend -- only to be condemned for being honest. That's precisely what happened to Carrie Prejean, runner up in the recent Miss USA competition, who had the audacity to say on national television that marriage should be reserved for men and women. Forget our forefathers; I'd love to hear what people from the 1930s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s would say about this debacle.

Here is a just a sampling of Perez Hilton's (the judge who asked the question about whether Ms. Prejean thinks the rest of America should follow in Vermont's footsteps by allowing same-sex marriage) comments:

"She gave THE WORST answer in pageant history."

"I would expected Miss CA to be prepared for the question."

"Miss CA was not the perfect Miss USA."

In an interview this morning, Matt Lauer asks Hilton what he, as a judge for the Miss USA pageant (I can't imagine what the qualifications are for such a position), is looking for from the contestants. "Do you want somebody who stands by her beliefs, or do you want someone who panders to judges?" asks Lauer. To which Perez answers, "Miss USA is somebody who should give the right answers."

And there you have it: the right answers. Now you need to pick up a copy of Tammy Bruce's The New Thought Police, if you haven't already -- and you'll learn what's behind this entire thing. Political correctness is an insidious form of thought control. It means publicly insisting something is true when you know in your heart it isn't. It means saying things you don't mean so people will like you.

Such is the mark of any good liberal. Modern liberals have been taught to believe that making value judgments -- not personal judgments, as in "I hate you because you're black or green or purple" -- but value judgments about what's best for society, is off limits. So Americans keep their mouths shut. They say very little about what they really think for fear of censure.

Then along comes this beautiful breath of fresh air in one Ms. Carrie Prejean, who's no doubt unhappy about her loss. Though she'll never know whether her politically incorrect answer cost her the crown, she has her suspicions. Lest she have her doubts, she has Perez Hilton to assure her that it's indeed because of her answer that she lost.

But her response to Matt Lauer when asked about the experience? "I knew I was not going to win because I had spoken from my heart. I was true to myself. I don't take back what I said." How wonderful to know such people still exist.

As for Perez Hilton, here's what he has to say about Carrie Prejean: "She's a dumb bitch."

I am not a pessimistic person by nature, but this one may just change that about me.

Oprah, Teens, and Sex

Though I didn't see it, last week Oprah did a show on teens and sex. At one point, according to my television sources, Oprah and others were discussing the best way to approach teen sexuality. Apparently Oprah took the standard, politically correct (read: liberal) approach: Let your kids know you don't want them to have sex --but make sure to provide them with condoms, "just in case." That way your children are safe should they make the decision to have sex. Then Gayle King, Oprah's best friend -- a woman who actually has children -- vehemently disagreed.

Gayle King is wiser than Oprah.

For one thing, that entire approach is akin to telling someone, "I don't want you to kill Joe; but in case you decide to, here's a gun." You cannot purport to stand for something, and then take it all back with an action that undermines your goal. Second, the term "safe sex" -- which, coincidentally, is now referred to as "safer sex," no doubt because people who use this term finally accepted there's no such thing as safe sex -- was a term coined for the AIDS epidemic, and it has been absorbed into Western culture. When people think about the term today, they associate it with condoms and the attempt to make sure young, unmarried people "protect" themselves. Clearly Oprah -- along with all her cohorts in the media -- haven't read Unprotected, by Dr. Miriam Grossman, a former campus psychiatrist who blew the whistle on our culture's ignorant view of sexuality and our nation's youth. Of course, even if they had read it, even if they had learned that the only way to be safe is to not engage in casual sex in the first place -- they'd dismiss this as conservative hogwash. After all, casual sex is a fait accompli, they'd say. You can't make young people abstain from sex.

Maybe not. But you can make them think differently about it. The entire premise of safe sex is a lie, perpetuated by liberals and their politically correct followers who are too lazy to think for themselves. I spent years with teenagers: teaching, disciplining, and counseling them. And I think much more highly of this group of Americans than Oprah and some of their parents do.

What I mean by that is this. The main argument from liberals regarding sex and teenagers is that "you can try and instill your values, but kids will be kids. They're going to do it anyway, so they might as well be safe." So give them a condom. Better yet, use a banana to show them how to put it on. Dr. Laura Berman, one of Oprah's guests, goes even further. In her handbook titled "The Sex Ed Handbook" (which can be downloaded from Oprah's website), Berman suggests this to mothers: "You might want to have a candid talk with your daughter about exploring or learning about her body or even offer her a simple clitoral vibrator."

Excuse me? Are you f---ing kidding me? (Sorry, that's my friend Susie's natural response to shock -- which I think has rubbed off on me.) Sex education sure has come a long way. We've gone from one extreme -- way back when, where no one dared to mention the word sex let alone explain what it means -- to handing our children vibrators. I have nothing against masturbation, mind you; but it's not something that requires my involvement, thank you very much.

America is a country hell bent on extremes. You do NOT need to hand your daughter a vibrator or your son a condom. The answer to kids and sex isn't complicated. It's much harder to deal with now that we live in a sexualized culture, yes; but it isn't complicated. There are three things to do as a parent when it comes to children and sex. One, teach them everything they need to know that's developmentally appropriate for them at the time. Two, instill the good old fashioned value of self-respect. Teaching self-respect means letting your children know that they are so valuable as human beings, and consequently their bodies are so special, that no one should ever be allowed to use it for recreation. Tell them sex is not a recreational activity for teenagers -- and that yes, you expect them not to engage in such activity. And three, let them know that they can come to you any at time for anything -- and you will always embrace them and take care of them.

But, say the naysayers, teenagers can't help themselves! Their bodies take over their minds! I have two responses to this. One, if you set the bar low, you will most likely reap what you sow. Set it high, and -- more often than not -- people rise to the occasion. And that's what I mean when I say I think more highly of young people than Oprah does. As Dr. Grossman says, "The young people I know are neither stupid nor enslaved to their urges. They are capable and motivated, and many will respond to an ennobling message, reject the messages of our culture, and learn new behaviors." I couldn't agree more.

After all, fifty years ago we didn't have the mess we have today. Sure, teenagers fooled around; and sure, some got pregnant. But it was rare. And the reason it was rare is because the expectations were such that teenagers did their best to reign themselves in. Today teenagers don't need to do this. People like Oprah and their parents have assured them they're not capable of raising the bar. So why should they try?

And for your last thought -- you know, the one about whether or not I'll be forced to eat my words when my nine-year-old daughter finds herself pregnant at 16 -- here's my response: Yes, that could happen. It could happen despite my efforts. But it probably won't. And even if it does, I will have the comfort of knowing I did everything I could possibly could to keep it from happening.

The Ashley Madison Agency

Perhaps some of you can help me out here. My husband alerted me to this ad he saw on television about "married dating." It's called The Ashley Madison Agency. I'm probably behind the ball on this one, as I usually am if it's television-related. (I need to start watching more TV.) The company's slogan is "Life is Short. Have an Affair."

So I laughed and asked my husband if this was a joke or something. No, he said. It's no joke. So then I asked, "Well, wait. So is it like an open marriage type thing, where it's all on the up and up?" No, he says. So basically, the purpose of this company is to offer people who are unsatisfied in their marriages a means to cheat on their spouse. If I'm missing something here, please tell me. Because as morally vacuous as our society is, I still have a hard time believing this is real. I mean, morality aside, who has time to have an affair?

Affairs are nothing but trouble. No good can come from it -- unless, of course, both partners agree to have them and want to stay married for other reasons. (You know, like Bill and Hillary - who my husband's convinced have an "arrangement.") And only if there are no children in the picture.

What's most striking about this company is that it's advocating for premeditated affairs. It's not like a case of two very unhappy people, one of whom falls into the lap of another man or woman and tries desperately to do the right thing. This is pre-planned, paid-for-in-advance adultery. I don't get it. How could a place like this exist?

Even if we are morally corrupt.

A New Poll on Capitalism vs. Socialism

Just 53% Say Capitalism Better Than Socialism
Thursday, April 09, 2009

Only 53% of American adults believe capitalism is better than socialism.
The latest Rasmussen Reports national telephone survey found that 20% disagree and say socialism is better. Twenty-seven percent (27%) are not sure which is better. Adults under 30 are essentially evenly divided: 37% prefer capitalism, 33% socialism, and 30% are undecided. Thirty-somethings are a bit more supportive of the free-enterprise approach with 49% for capitalism and 26% for socialism. Adults over 40 strongly favor capitalism, and just 13% of those older Americans believe socialism is better.

Investors by a 5-to-1 margin choose capitalism. As for those who do not invest, 40% say capitalism is better while 25% prefer socialism.
There is a partisan gap as well. Republicans - by an 11-to-1 margin - favor capitalism. Democrats are much more closely divided: Just 39% say capitalism is better while 30% prefer socialism. As for those not affiliated with either major political party, 48% say capitalism is best, and 21% opt for socialism.

The question posed by Rasmussen Reports did not define either capitalism or socialism
It is interesting to compare the new results to an earlier survey in which 70% of Americans prefer a free-market economy. The fact that a “free-market economy” attracts substantially more support than “capitalism” may suggest some skepticism about whether capitalism in the United States today relies on free markets.

Other survey data supports that notion. Rather than seeing large corporations as committed to free markets, two-out-of-three Americans believe that big government and big business often work together in ways that hurt consumers and investors. Fifteen percent (15%) of Americans say they prefer a government-managed economy, similar to the 20% support for socialism. Just 14% believe the federal government would do a better job running auto companies, and even fewer believe government would do a better job running financial firms.

Most Americans today hold views that can generally be defined as populist while only seven percent (7%) share the elitist views of the Political Class.

Sorry for My Absence

I promise to get back to blogging more regularly as soon as I can. I'm in the midst of re-working my book proposal and that's about all I have time for. As soon as I get far enough along with it, I'll be back.

Thanks for your patience!

Why This Country Is So Divided

Read the excerpt below from Smart Girl Nation, a new blog of the grassroots organization Smart Girl Politics:

Today at the grocery store I have been going to for over 8 years, talking with the cashier I have seen almost every single week, I came out. This is the cashier who ‘treats’ me to my children’s birthday cakes, who asks me about my day, who gives me a hug after every visit, who always remembers to give credit for my cloth bags. She saw me through three pregnancies and three new babies. I have felt over our many years that we have indeed formed a friendship. If I ever saw her in public, I would not hesitate to chat with her and I feel she would do the very same for me.

Today I came into her line as I do every Friday. She asked me about my week. I told her I was tired, gave her the 411 and then asked about hers. Right away she told me about the joy she was feeling for our new president. I smiled and continued to unpack my cart. It’s her right to be joyful and happy!

She went on and described how wonderful it was having people come through that went to DC to watch the Inauguration. And how magical the whole thing was. Again, this is great. I am happy she got to meet them. And then she added about how it was America again. I stopped unloading the groceries as I felt a chill.

I have always loved our country. I have always been proud of our country. Even during Carter and Clinton, I felt blessed to be an American. My own family fought under George Washington, my husband is a marine. We are a nation of value, strength and freedom. More Americans died in the Civil War than in all other wars combined. A war that ended slavery–a practice still going on today in many countries, especially in Africa. We were and are a great land.

I looked at the cashier and decided to say one thing. “It was wonderful. I just did not think booing President Bush was appropriate at all.”

She stopped what she doing and looked at me with shock. I felt sick to my stomach. I never really speak my mind on these items. I wondered what she was thinking.
I grabbed some more food and added that the behavior of the crowds just really upset me. How can they say “we are one” when they are so horribly disrespectful to a president that has kept then safe after 9/11. She spoke. “He had a 22% approval rating.”

“And congress has a 19% and they are still there.” I was stepping far out of my comfort zone.

“Well I saw a republican on TV and he didn’t like Bush.”

“I’m not saying you have to like him. Booing him is disrespecting, the man, his work and the office.”

Stone silence. It felt colder than December in Alaska and she no longer looked at me as she bagged the groceries.

I smiled and switched the conversation, trying to break the ice. Slowly she began to speak to me again but it felt different–guarded and short.

I sighed as I watched her pack up the groceries. I hoped I did not lose a friend. This is one of the reasons I don’t come out. This is why I avoided blogging my views during and after the election. I did not want to offend anyone. I was worried people would not comment or come back. I would be labeled as one of those “stupid Republicans that just don’t get it”.
Thinking those thoughts, I would think of how silly I was being. I go to liberal blogs. I like liberal bloggers. I don’t view them differently and I do not think less of them because they do not share my ideology. The bald eagle needs both the right and left wing to fly. This is not to say I agree with them. And if I really do not agree, I usually do not comment and wait on the next post. I don’t feel comfortable going to a blog, a virtual house, and slamming the post in the comments. That’s just not cool.

So today, I am coming out once again to you. My name is Lisa. I am a strong conservative. I voted for GW Bush twice and last fall I voted for Sarah Palin (that is not a typo, I was not going to vote for McCain before Palin, I was going to write-in ‘Ghost of Reagan’) and I am praying I will get to vote for Palin in 2012. I am pro-life, pro-gun and pro–Gitmo. I am also that very busy mom of 4 who is dealing with a baby who won’t stop nursing, a boy being labeled, a daughter who loves ballet and an oldest child who hates math.
Don’t worry. This will not be a political blog. If I ever get that urge, I would start a different one. Twitter and other groups are enough for me.

Oh and my cashier today did not give me any item as a treat, come around to give me a good-bye hug nor credit my cloth bags (the first time ever). It could have been worse.

This excerpt gets to the heart of how bad things are for conservatives today. When you're liberal, you're free to shout your beliefs from the rooftop. After all, your worldview is in line with the views of the popular group: Hollywood and the media. When your views are not in line with the popular group, you're the devil. The story above demonstrates precisely why most conservatives do not speak their mind. Who wants to put up with the bull shit this woman did?

No conservative would treat a liberal the way this liberal treated the conservative. Conservatives are confident in the truth, and are thus not threatened by a liberal's take on the world. Challenge a liberal's worldview, and the response will be much like it was when you were in grade school: you'll be dissed by the cool crowd. Just like an insecure child who needs followers in order to feel good about himself, so it is with a modern liberal.

That's what happens when you don't have truth on your side.